Written by: Camille I must be honest in admitting that turning 30 has not been something that I looked forward to. It isn’t something that I feared, rather, it was something that I knew was sneaking upon me and some how in my mind it meant that things would undeniably be different and that my wanderlust or joy for life would cease to exist. I woke up that morning with no expectations other than the typical “mommy duties” that awaited my day. Having been up with the baby through the night I indulged in a little extra sleep time after Paul had left for work knowing that the kids were content eating cereal and watching TV downstairs. Then my 5 year old boy shows up, “Mom, I have a surprise for you. Come downstairs.” It may have taken him twice to convince me and I wandered down the stairs in my messy bathrobe and anticipated a heart felt LEGO creation of some kind. Instead I found my husband, Paul, sitting on the couch in his dress shirt and tie. I was baffled and had no idea why he was still here. He announced, “It is your 30th birthday and you have a schedule full of things I’ve planned for you to do! First up is the gym, your Body Jam class starts at 10, so hurry and feed the baby so you can get ready!” I was beyond shocked and stared at him in bewilderment for a few minutes and he said again, “You would like to go to your gym class, right?” Yes! I haven’t been to that class since I had my placental tear during my pregnancy almost 8 months earlier! I entered the class with a perma-grin on my face. The kind you get at 15 and you find out your crush likes you back. I was so looking forward to my day and announced to the WHOLE class, “I am turning 30 today!’ Not something that everyone would love to proclaim but I was feeling so good! After class Paul said it was time to get ready and choose wherever it was that I wanted to go to lunch. I chose Zupas because it is Zupas and had a wonderful lunch with my main man, little Jayne, and baby Jett. After lunch Paul told me to get in the car and call him when I got there. So as directed I did, he answered and said, “Open the middle compartment of the car between the seats and tell me what you see.” I did so, “Ummmmm, a free oil change?” seriously? He laughed and said, “Yeah, you are getting your oil changed! Just kidding. Look underneath that!” Underneath I found two crisp $50 dollar bills as Paul announced it was time for me to go shopping wherever I would like to go…kid free! “You mean, I can actually use a changing room?” I thought to myself as I squeeled. YES!
Of course I chose H&M! Shopping alone was an hour of full bliss. I mean, admit it ladies, when do we get the chance to change in a dressing room without wondering if our little one is going to roam into the changing room next to ours or announce that just as your clothes are off they desperately need to go to the bathroom!
I came home to feed Jett and Paul told me it was now time to get a MASSAGE!! This day couldn’t have gotten any better. Paul just kept saying, “You only turn 30 once!”
I am pretty sure that after experiencing that massage I would do almost anything to make it happen monthly. I have scoliosis and since having the baby I have had some serious back pain; even more so then when I was pregnant. The massues almost laughed at me for how tight I was and that I almost cried in pain. I happen to like it in a way that it “hurts so good.” That sounds really dirty. Anyway, it was heaven. And to my ultimate surprise when I got home those nearest and dearest to my heart started showing up at the door. Nothing means more to me than spending time with those I love most.
I didn’t get a picture with all that came but I was so thankful to them for taking the time to show up and give me a squeeze. And most of all I was so thankful to this guy….and yes I realize that he has bunny ears in the picture.
So on to turning 30. “How does it feel?” “What have you learned?” “Do you feel any different?”
This is what I’ve come up with:
1. To accept that we are all a work in progress.
Every. Single. one of us. This means that we must allow for those in our lives to mess up and learn from their own mistakes and be willing to forgive. It also means not to be too hard on yourself. We all have good days and bad days.
2. Let go of the things that do not ADD to your life.
This could be clothing, bad habits, old ‘friends’, new ‘friends’, or clutter in our minds that have been holding us ransom. Of course relationships are work and worth every single moment of it, but I’ve come to a clear understanding of what is worth the extra effort and what isn’t. One of the most profound things I learned at 20 was when a boy I was interested in dating made the first move and I didn’t reciprocate the affection. In the kindest way he said, “I am interested in you and I want this to happen…but I will never try to convince someone to like me.” Without knowing it he had taught me a valuable lesson that has stuck with me to this day. Relationships are a two way street and should involve a healthy give and take. Surround yourself with those who ADD to your life and build you up.
3. Recognize the power and the ability that YOU have to choose to be happy.
So often we are affected by what happens to us and do not let our own minds govern the way we feel. I know this is something that I am still working on. Our minds are a powerful tool that shape our reality and our own happiness. Use it wisely.
4. Embrace knowing who you are and the blessings of those who surround you.
So often it is easy for us to take for granted what we hold most dear. There is so much worldly “noise” that pulls us one way or the other, but to recognize the people who love us and support us will guide us through life. Also to embrace the things that make you happy. Like for me, turning on a Beyonce song at the end of an especially hard day can buoy my spirits and get me through those last few hours of crazy before I can have peace and sit down. Know what makes you happy and own it. Write a list and use it!
5. Realize that gaining a year in your life is a gift and not an unavoidable curse.
Growing older is something that is denied so many and I hope and pray that I can be here to see my grand babies grow and perhaps some of their babies. Live in the present and realize you will never in your life be this young again.
“You must live in the present, launch yourself on every wave, find your eternity in each moment. Fools stand on their island of opportunities and look toward another land. There is no other land; there is no other life but this.” ― Henry David Thoreau
Hello! I am Camille, a wife, mother of four, Disney obsessed, certified teacher, and reality optimist. Motherhood comes with its ups and downs, and I hope while you’re here you’ll find something that makes your #momlife easier!