Do you ever mess up and swear you’ll never do it again?
Kinley showed me this video of Jordan yesterday, and I about died! I couldn’t believe that he’s grown up so much since we adopted him, almost five years ago. And boy, isn’ he cute?! I remember that little stinker pooping on the floor – and I couldn’t help but get this commitment on video.
I’m pretty sure we all feel this way at one time or another. As hard as we try, we are still human – and we MESS UP. When I look back at my life, I realize that I expected to be pretty much perfect by the time I was middle aged – or at least to understand most things. This is not only inaccurate – it’s kind of funny. We all make goals at the beginning of the New Year – and slide back into old habits before we know it.
What really matters is what we do when we mess up. If we give up, blame, become depressed or angry – we become stagnant and ineffective. But, if we can pick ourselves up – dust off our failures – and keep going, the sky is the limit. Don’t let yourself be trapped by frustration. Let it be the fuel that drives you to become better and accomplish things that were previously impossible.
Have you ever heard of the 12 Step program? Mostly people hear about it when they – or someone they know – needs extra help with an addiction. It’s easy to think of such things as being for someone else, and not ourselves. In reality, these 12 steps can help all of us! We are all working through different things – which is exactly why we are on this earth. I find myself working through different pieces of the 12 steps, all the time.
Recovery is sought in several areas, which may include physical, mental, emotional, and spiritual.The following are the original twelve steps as published by Alcoholics Anonymous. I’m not going to get into a deep description of each, but I wanted to list them for you really quick.
1. We admitted we were powerless over (fill in the bland) alcohol—that our lives had become unmanageable.
2. Came to believe that a Power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity.
3. Made a decision to turn our will and our lives over to the care of God as we understood Him.
4. Made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves.
5. Admitted to God, to ourselves, and to another human being the exact nature of our wrongs.
6. Were entirely ready to have God remove all these defects of character.
7. Humbly asked Him to remove our shortcomings.
8. Made a list of all persons we had harmed, and became willing to make amends to them all.
9. Made direct amends to such people wherever possible, except when to do so would injure them or others.
10. Continued to take personal inventory, and when we were wrong, promptly admitted it.
11. Sought through prayer and meditation to improve our conscious contact with God as we understood Him, praying only for knowledge of His will for us and the power to carry that out.
12. Having had a spiritual awakening as the result of these steps, we tried to carry this message to alcoholics, and to practice these principles in all our affairs.
You see? These are things we all need. We all need to be happy, have understanding and patience for others, and the knowledge of how to change. So if you find that you’ve accidental “pooped on the floor” like Jordan, and you need to work on something in your life, so you can feel happy – it’s worth it. Happiness comes from being okay with who we are – and this takes work. I know I have a lot of work to do!
Do you have some experience with the 12 step program? Have you found happiness through working the steps? I’d love to hear. One of the biggest things I’ve learned is that it’s super easy to wait for other people to change – and a lot harder to turn the focus onto ourselves. A long time ago, I went to the 12 step program to support someone else, and I walked away realizing that I needed it every bit as much as they did.
Written by: Janae Moss